this was accidental
this fall into a non-direction
i thought that moving would make things more obvious
but i torture myself and shiver
because i don't believe in god. not one damn bit.
we're just faithless chess pieces praying
and playing with ourselves
i miss her, memories are like a forgotten time capsule
i am absent of him, dreams taped into a dark box

things i saw
they broke my heart more deeply than any lover could
and there is not a thing to do
no response, no prayers, no god to talk to
no way to explain my visions
or the terror that stares at me like an un-moving glass eye
no way to starve it away
the exhausted fear that there is nothing to do
and that everything up until now has just been an accident