irregular

heart,
pallipitating;
like a Junebug's wings
in August
or September
fluttery, dying, dead.

November:
past the falling,
past shining,
past, caring.

NOW.
throat sticking
neck swollen
eyes drying.

benign tumor starts to grow
hormones forget to flow;
Barren.

why bother at all, my
pounding rhythm.

she told me that the heart skipped a beat.
when she listened,
eyes closed.

needle piercing vein
hand on wrist
vials
bandaged
bruised
rose red, deeper even;

in rhythmic intervals,
puncture deeper.
and the "me" will be gone
only the source
remaining

unreligious.
a number.
no letters.
a stick figure,
with too much flesh


October:
a failing.
the fallen
wing.

buzzing, whirring and rhythm
cease.

ignoring, years
forgetting
months.
minutes are what to live for...

pulse
irregular